“Knowing how to be solitary is central to the art of loving. When we can be alone, we can be with others without using them as a means of escape.” -Bell Hooks
When was the last time you went to lunch by yourself, or went to movie alone. Maybe you find it weird going to coffee, or lunch by yourself. In this age of social media, we have forgot the importance of being alone. Even if you go for lunch alone someday, you immediately take out your smartphone and check your Facebook, play games and watch videos. You act like normal, but you keep your head down and pray that no one looks at you. The truth is, you are just pretending. Yes, pretending to be busy to hide your embarrassment at being alone.
That’s the problem of this social media society, we consider being alone as antisocial and weird.
We are all born alone, we will die alone, then why we are so ashamed of having some alone time in public space. Don’t be alone all the time but at least in a week, go for coffee or dinner by yourself, don’t wait for anyone to accompany you. You will feel relaxed, there would be no burden to dress yourself to impress someone, you can order whatever you like without thinking about what your friends might think. Being alone helps you to connect with yourself.
Don’t assume solitude as loneliness, both are entirely different. In loneliness, you feel alone, you don’t enjoy, but in solitude, you are alone, but you don’t feel alone, you enjoy things by yourself. And the day you start enjoying things by yourself, you will never depend on someone else for your happiness, your happiness will be in your hand, isn’t that great?
Since it’s the weekend, go for coffee by yourself, turn off the phone, just enjoy your solitude, connect with yourself.
Who knows, you may find your awakening in the moment of solitude.
“Aloneness is the joy of just being yourself. It is being joyous with yourself, it is enjoying your own company. There are very few people who enjoy their own company. And it is a very strange world nobody enjoys his company and everybody wants others to enjoy his company. If they don’t enjoy he feels insulted and alone, he feels disgusted with himself. In fact, if you cannot enjoy your own company, who else is going to enjoy it?
Aloneness, solitude is positive. It is overflowing joy for no reason. It is our very nature to be joyous hence there is no need to depend on anybody else. There is no other motive in it, it is simply there. Just as the water flows downwards, your being rises upwards. Just give it a chance give it solitude
Compose yourself, be happy.
You are a seeker.”